Busy Dublin Vet Clinic Seeks Experienced Cat Cuddler

Mary Simpson
by Mary Simpson
Wanted: Experienced Cat Cuddler for busy vet clinic in Dublin, Ireland. Must speak fluent purr, have an advanced degree in petting, and possess a warm lap.

I just found my dream job! It appears that at long last, a role has been created that will officially allow cat fanciers to play-it-forward: Cat Cuddler.

Understanding that touching, cuddling and handling felines play a huge role in their socialization, the clever folk at a busy Dublin-based veterinary clinic decided to make the role a little more intentional. So rather than the errant head scratch or chin rub delivered to a caged kitty by one of their harried technicians, Just Cats veterinary clinic in Ireland advertised for someone who is prepared to devote their day to something we all love to do – petting and cuddling felines. Count me in!

But Just Cats is pretty specific about what they’re looking for in this “crazy cat person” role (their words, not mine). The ideal prospective Cuddler must have a track record of feeding strays (hey, I do that), must feel warm and fuzzy when they pet cats (my lap sure feels warm and my lint brush definitely gets fuzzy), have gentle hands “capable of petting and stroking cats for long periods of time” (ever binge-watch TV with a cat on your lap?)

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There’s more. They want someone who is “softly spoken” and capable of “cat whispering” to calm the more nervous cats (my crew always sleep when I’m talking to them – hey, this is looking good!).

You’ll also need to possess the rare skill of understanding different types of purring. (OMG, I’ve got this. Soft fake purrs mean” get lost I’m trying to sleep”. Loud real purrs mean “yes, those treats now”).

And, on top of all that? You’ll also need a qualification recognised by the veterinary council of Ireland. (Crap!)

If you possess all of the above, send your resume and cover letter to miaow@justcats.ie. I’m sure a photo of you with your own kit won’t hurt!

Mary Simpson
Mary Simpson

Sharing space with three seriously judgy Schnoodles and a feline who prefers to be left alone. #LivingMyBestLife

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